"Post Care"

I took this cool photo of birds. I needed some kind of visual for this...

I'm currently doing a voluntary IOP at a facility three days a week. Every day my mood rating is 8 or 9 because I'm not in constant pain so I don't feel like I have any real problems. This is more so they can monitor me on my meds, make sure I'm not overmedicated.

I'm the old guy in the room there, it feels like college and I feel like Pierce from the show Community. Everyone in my group is so young, right out of high school, they have chores and stuff. I pray for all of them to find their way and get the help they need. They're good people.

It's funny to me that one of the coping mechanisms is imagining you're somewhere else. "Put yourself in a calm place in your mind." Let me get this straight... If I'm seeing or hearing people who aren't there, it's problematic but if I'm retreating to imaginary places, that's dandy. It's like Nightmare on Elm Street, the ways they keep Freddy away. All good in the hood. I'm not seeing or hearing anything that you are not seeing or hearing, people, places, or things. No imaginary nouns.

I'm not one of these woo woo guys, I've been coping with situations I don't like for 40 years. I'm tremendous at remedying problems that I can fix and letting the ones I can't sort themselves out... serenity prayer like a motherfucker. They're going to yell at me because I failed a drug test for marijuana. I'm going to tell them I don't care because I'm 40 and I had priapism from Trazodone, weed was the only way to stop being a tripod. The goal posts kept moving, I can get to the end now. That's the real victory.

Also, I got affirmation that my life is hilarious because I made the therapist laugh really hard at my idea of petty revenge.